a letter to Santa

[kellinator]

Dear Santa,

I have had a very good year and I really don't need anything for Christmas. But there is one thing that I really really want.

All I want for Christmas is for Lindsay Lohan and Britney Spears to keep doing dumb shit.

I mean, I know just asking will probably land me on the naughty list for good, but seriously, Santa! Have you seen this shit? It's better than Days of Our Lives!

Now if I were nice, I would ask you to bring Lindsay a breathalyzer to hook up to her computer's power button so she can't drunk-email and some damn panties for Britney, but we've already established that I'm not nice, so please don't.

I know it's a lot to ask, Santa, but remember, I always say screw the cookies and leave rum out for you instead. If K-Fed does something else really stupid and entertaining before Christmas, I'll throw in tequila too.

Love,
Kelly

Comments

[paradisacorbasi.livejournal.com]

So metaquotesed!

[sage-and-sea.livejournal.com]

Dear Santa -

My request dovetails with kellinator's. CJ & I have been really really good this year (and for many years) and if Brit is going to keep doing stupid things, apparently forgetting that she has a toddler and a baby at home, could we have them? No, really. Pretty please, Santa???

With love,

Deb

[teague.livejournal.com]

hehee...Awsome. You're not just getting coal in your stocking, you may get a bitchslap.

You are my hero.

[sharrainchains.livejournal.com]

Dear Kelly,

I am pretty sure I can guarantee that you will get what you wanted this Christmas. Timing I won't promise: there should be some surprises, after all. Now make sure that's some good sippin' tequila, girl!

-- S. Claus

[heathrow.livejournal.com]

I think I love you.

[revised-06.livejournal.com]

I want to marry you too, Kelly. For this post alone. Hehehehehe!

[spikepage.livejournal.com]

Dear Satan

While you're at it, could you make Paris Hilton and the Bush twins get into a three-way? It's not like I want to watch..but still..it'd mean steady work for all those fine folks at the Weekly World News and UK Sun.

While you're at it, how about giving a few of my co-workers urinary tract infections.

YMOS
~Spike~

[ilexx.livejournal.com]

i love watching lindsay lohan.

[spudmanson.livejournal.com]

Don't forget Paris!!! That bitch is entertaining for days....


I just really wanted an In & Out Burger, officer!

[pinkeffigy.livejournal.com]

I don't, because apparently watching antics like this enough causes men to think we are all supposed to be just as stupid. And they refuse to ask the rest of us out.