kellinator | (no subject)

Tonight on Law and Order, the beloved (and longest-tenured of the current cast) Det. Lennie Briscoe departs the 2-7. Law and Order fans' mourning is somewhat tempered by the promise that Jerry Orbach will be playing Briscoe on the next Law and Order spinoff, Law and Order: Trial by Jury, a midseason replacement.

So Dick Wolf's plan to take over television as we know it is alive and well. But how about some Law and Order spinoffs we'd really like to see?

Law and Order: Cranky Old Cops. Briscoe and Munch partner up to bitch about their ex-wives and ex-partners. Cragen occasionally yells at them for not getting anything done and for eating all the doughnuts.
Law and Order: Shrinks Gone Wild. In between round-table diagnoses, Olivet, Skoda, and Huang gripe about the lack of respect they get from the detectives and being left to twist in the wind on the witness stand. For sweeps, they try to psychoanalyze Bobby Goren and end up going on a colossal bender after giving up.
Law and Order: ME's Office. In a blatant attempt to give CSI a run for its money, Rodgers and Warner sit around the Medical Examiner's office conducting autopsies and playing catch with internal organs. This one has a laugh track.
Law and Order: The Ex-Assistants' Club. McCoy's former "female assistants", including his ex-wife, start their own criminal defense practice, where they constantly needle Jack in court while making twice as much money as he does.
Law and Order: Arthur's Angels. The never-seen, only-heard Arthur Branch employs Serena and Casey in his detective agency. Unfortunately, Serena and Casey tend to burst into tears when they chip a nail, which greatly impairs their ability to be badasses. Sanity is maintained by Bosley stand-in Fin, who spends most of his time muttering about stupid white bitches and busting a cap in someone.