Witness for the prosecution: "yup, I saw her do it!" Cross-Examining Attorney: "You saw her kill the victim?" WFTP: "She said his name a few times, mumbles some weird voodoo words and slung a dead chicken around" CX: "The victim was found dead in his home of a nesty, sudden heart attack. Did she strike him with the chicken?" WFTP: "Oh no, she wasn't at his place." CX: "She wasn't at the scene of the crime?" WFTP: "She was at her weird shack with the skulls outside." CX: "So she wasn't actually present for the victim's death?" WFTP: "Well, no." CX: "So how did she do it? magic? telekenisis?" WFTP: "I told you already, voodoo." CX: "So she said his name, said a few other words, waved a dead chicken, and this caused the victim to drop dead of a massive heart failure?" WFTP: "They weren't just words, they were voodoo words! They have powers!" CX: "So if I were to ask you to repeat those words for us, here in the courtroom, I could fall dead in the same way?" WFTP: "Well, no. I mean, we'd needthe chicken, and anyway, I don't do voodoo, I don't know how to talk to the spirits!" CX: "The spirits?" WFTP: "The spirits of dead people. She does voodoo, she talks to dead people and they do stuff for her." CX: "So it was actually the spirit of a dead person, not the defendant that caused the death of the victim." WFTP: (Addressing the judge) "Your honor, So the defendent, if it is actually she who called the spirit of the dead person who killed the victim, would merely be an acessory to the crime. It's this dead soul that needs to be on trial!" Judge: "We can't put spirits of the dead on trial!" CX: "But as it acted with free will as a hired killer..." Judge: "sigh."
i suppose how they died would make a difference - if part of the ritual involved boiling any vital bodypart of the victim or removing their heart or blowing scianide in their face, the defense might not hold up in court...
no subject
Date: 2002-07-29 12:31 pm (UTC)Re:
Date: 2002-07-29 12:41 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2002-07-29 12:43 pm (UTC)I think so, but this time you wear the culottes.
no subject
Date: 2002-07-29 01:35 pm (UTC)Witness for the prosecution: "yup, I saw her do it!"
Cross-Examining Attorney: "You saw her kill the victim?"
WFTP: "She said his name a few times, mumbles some weird voodoo words and slung a dead chicken around"
CX: "The victim was found dead in his home of a nesty, sudden heart attack. Did she strike him with the chicken?"
WFTP: "Oh no, she wasn't at his place."
CX: "She wasn't at the scene of the crime?"
WFTP: "She was at her weird shack with the skulls outside."
CX: "So she wasn't actually present for the victim's death?"
WFTP: "Well, no."
CX: "So how did she do it? magic? telekenisis?"
WFTP: "I told you already, voodoo."
CX: "So she said his name, said a few other words, waved a dead chicken, and this caused the victim to drop dead of a massive heart failure?"
WFTP: "They weren't just words, they were voodoo words! They have powers!"
CX: "So if I were to ask you to repeat those words for us, here in the courtroom, I could fall dead in the same way?"
WFTP: "Well, no. I mean, we'd needthe chicken, and anyway, I don't do voodoo, I don't know how to talk to the spirits!"
CX: "The spirits?"
WFTP: "The spirits of dead people. She does voodoo, she talks to dead people and they do stuff for her."
CX: "So it was actually the spirit of a dead person, not the defendant that caused the death of the victim."
WFTP: (Addressing the judge) "Your honor, So the defendent, if it is actually she who called the spirit of the dead person who killed the victim, would merely be an acessory to the crime. It's this dead soul that needs to be on trial!"
Judge: "We can't put spirits of the dead on trial!"
CX: "But as it acted with free will as a hired killer..."
Judge: "sigh."
no subject
Date: 2002-07-29 01:57 pm (UTC)I think so Brain......
Date: 2002-07-29 04:26 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2002-07-30 03:08 am (UTC)I think so, Brain, but where are we going to find rubber pants our size?
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That voodoo thing could come in handy. I'll keep you updated.
I think so Brain...
Date: 2002-07-30 10:24 am (UTC)Ok, it's my favorite, I had to do it.
Has Brain ever used voodoo? ("It's Perfect! I use these voodoo dolls to control Ted Turner, Bill Gates, and Steven Spielburg...")
hmm