This same idea (i.e. people make their own misery) occurred to me a few years ago when I was working in a larger office setting. It seemed like everyone else would come into work everyday with a brand new bit of personal misery to share. Yes, some of it was real and tragic but a good deal of it was...well...it wouldn't have been anything had they not embraced it and turned it into an excuse for a pity-party.
I blame gossip.
Sure, I'll participate in office chit-chat but what I REALLY want to talk about is politics, social problems, the weather, what was on TV the night before, etc... I'm not interested in hearing about the personal woes/sex lives/tragedies of those with whom I have to share office space.
Bottom line, I think you're right that there ARE people who prefer the misery niche, but I won't say that they inflate their personal misery merely because they're unwilling to escape a comfort zone. Rather, I believe a great many of them have martyr complexes that require regular feeding.
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2004-04-15 11:07 am (UTC)This same idea (i.e. people make their own misery) occurred to me a few years ago when I was working in a larger office setting. It seemed like everyone else would come into work everyday with a brand new bit of personal misery to share. Yes, some of it was real and tragic but a good deal of it was...well...it wouldn't have been anything had they not embraced it and turned it into an excuse for a pity-party.
I blame gossip.
Sure, I'll participate in office chit-chat but what I REALLY want to talk about is politics, social problems, the weather, what was on TV the night before, etc... I'm not interested in hearing about the personal woes/sex lives/tragedies of those with whom I have to share office space.
Bottom line, I think you're right that there ARE people who prefer the misery niche, but I won't say that they inflate their personal misery merely because they're unwilling to escape a comfort zone. Rather, I believe a great many of them have martyr complexes that require regular feeding.