Election Night with the Kellinator

[kellinator]

7:30 PM: Arrive home for Ed and Sandy's "Beat the Bushes" potluck. My Dubya's Dumb Artichoke Dip doesn't turn out right, but Saxby Sucks Stuffed Mushrooms are a hit.

8:30 PM: Things are not going so well. People start leaving as the mood turns from party to wake.

9:00 PM and after: Only Sandy, my landlady, and I are left. We double our drinking speed to deal with the news on the TV. I make some political comments which make me sound certifiably crazy (and no I will not post them here because they could get me "detained") and immediately kick myself.

10:30 PM: Sandy and I decide we should move to Canada and smoke a lot of pot. Hey, it's better for us than the booze.

11:00 PM: When confronted with Saxby Chambliss' victory speech, I announce I can't stand it and I'm calling my mommy.

11:15 PM: I'm on the phone with my mom, who may or may not be able to tell I'm two sheets to the wind. I start crying hysterically and announcing that if this happens again in 2004 I'm moving to Canada or England. My mom thinks I'm overreacting and says it's cold in Canada. I remind her that I like the cold (which she damn well knows anyway).

Umm...well...sometime: My Republican friend calls to goad me. He can tell that I'm three and a half sheets to the wind. He makes fun of me, I hang up on him, he calls me back and tells me that it doesn't matter anyway and I won't care once I start cranking out babies. Then he starts talking about having sex or something. Not sure. Too drunk.

Sometime after that: I think about calling Natalia but I'm too drunk to deal with my shitty cell phone.

I either drink or cry myself to sleep. Can't really remember which.

Comments

[gina.livejournal.com]

Aw, I felt pretty much the same way. I could at least take some small comfort in the fact that Democrats swept the California offices. But, as someone posted earlier: "so much for checks and balances."

[alfabettezoupe.livejournal.com]

my sister was in tears last night... although she can pay for college if she has to she is a hope scholarship student as are the good majority of her friends. she's worried they will no longer be able to pay for school.

i fully agree with you about the canada or england part... i have dual citizenship with the uk and i'm willing to help anyone who needs it to immigrate if this happens in 2004

btw... i posted this (http://www.politicalstrikes.com/.images/ps756.jpg) in imaliberal & democrats

[theatrics.livejournal.com]

You don't know me, nor do I know you...but you've basically summed up everything that I've been saying the past two days. Let me know how England or Canada works out...I've opted to move to Amsterdam to escape this repulican terror.

I hear ya

[lac.livejournal.com]

A friend and I are thinking about moving to France and starting our own vineyard. If any annoying republicans show up, we're going to throw stale donuts at them. We had to deal with gloating republicans on a message board yesterday...he's across the country but I swear I heard his head explode.