kellinator: (smug)
[personal profile] kellinator
The telephone rings.

I put on my fake-cheery phone voice. "Law Library, circulation desk."

"Hugh MacMillan."

"Excuse me?"

"I want to talk to Hugh MacMillan."

Our library is named the Hugh MacMillan Law Library. There's even a huge plaque with his picture right in front of me. This is rather like calling Grant's Tomb and demanding to speak to Grant.

With obvious pleasure in my voice, I reply, "Hugh MacMillan died in 1995." The reference desk worker has figured out what is going on and is falling over herself with laughter.

"Oh, I'm so sorry. We have him down as our contact person here at Sprint."

No you fucking don't. You're talking out of your ass.

"Who's in charge of your phone service?"

"We're happy with our phone service."

"I want to talk to whoever's in charge of your phone service."

"Please hold on."

I put down the phone and quickly get permission from the reference desk to politely tell this person to go to hell.

With glee, I politely tell the person that no, he cannot talk to anyone, and hang up before he can respond.

Date: 2002-08-05 07:48 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mfree.livejournal.com
I take sinful pleasure in treating telemarketers horribly :)

Especially since most of the time I end up chewing them out for calling my cellphone...

Date: 2002-08-05 07:50 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kellinator.livejournal.com
He wasn't just a telemarketer. He was a stupid, rude telemarketer who was completely incapable of taking a hint.

Don't piss off the Kellinator!! She will mock you!!

Date: 2002-08-05 07:55 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] seaofsin.livejournal.com
Oh that made me smile. :)

Date: 2002-08-05 08:03 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kellinator.livejournal.com
I'm glad. Normally stuff like this pisses me off, but I just have to laugh at this one. It's too stupid to get mad about.

Date: 2002-08-05 08:04 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] stoobydoo.livejournal.com
Hehehehe...

That's like the people who call me at Publix asking us about purchasing computer supplies (which 1-is done through our corporate office and 2-we have our OWN software so it's custom made) and then I get to bring the bitch out on them - that usually makes my day...

=D

Date: 2002-08-05 08:19 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] nukewolf.livejournal.com
I once had the local newspaper office call me at work to sell me a subscription. Problem is, I work in a cleanroom like you see at Intel and such. White suit, booties, face mask, gloves, the whole nine yards. The only way I could have a newspaper in here is if it was sealed in a plastic bag. I got a big kick out of that one.

Date: 2002-08-05 08:42 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ilexx.livejournal.com
i've had that happen a couple of times, and i relish in saying everything i can to make them feel completely stupid for calling a business to sell something. maybe i shouldn't be so mean. *shrug*

please come to Burrito Art tonight?

Date: 2002-08-05 08:57 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kellinator.livejournal.com
For you, I will do my damnedness.

I am so sorry about Bianca. **hugs**

Date: 2002-08-05 09:25 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jet-li-wannabe.livejournal.com
I wonder if they called the administration building and asked to talk to Mr. or Mrs. Emory.

Heh, dumbasses.

Date: 2002-08-05 10:33 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] cinderly.livejournal.com
Hee! I love being able to do that to a stupid salesperson.

Date: 2002-08-05 10:54 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lindsaygail.livejournal.com
I just love it when they call me at work, because I have a hold button. I'm always really cheerful and say "Oh sure! Just hang on one second..." then put them on hold and never pick up again. It's such a joy to me to be able to annoy THEM. (And it's amazing how long some of them will hang on for)

Date: 2002-08-05 12:18 pm (UTC)
technomom: (Default)
From: [personal profile] technomom
Don't forget dishonest.

Date: 2002-08-05 09:03 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mrswarkie.livejournal.com
Heh!

Because our office is a branch office we have a General Manager, but no one ranked higher than that- they're all in our head office in the US.

I love saying to the cocky telemarketers who ring "Sure you can talk to our CEO or Managing Director, they're in our head office in America. Would you like the number?" They usually just hang up, or say "Uh, nevermind"

Makes my day :)

Date: 2002-08-06 09:22 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kellinator.livejournal.com
I'm getting a hell of a mental image out of that...

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