kellinator: (Default)
kellinator ([personal profile] kellinator) wrote2002-07-20 09:54 pm

Wow...

It freaks me out when I'm looking at the profile page of one of my LJ friends who's married or has kids or both and I realize they're my age.

I mean, most of the people I went to high school with are married, but it's Pulaski!! There's nothing else to do! And it's not like most of those marriages will last anyway...

[identity profile] fourtines.livejournal.com 2002-07-20 07:10 pm (UTC)(link)
I've read that lots of Gen X'ers are obsessed with marriage. Where as the last generation of women shunned marriage for careers, apparently our age group embraces romantic ideals of partnership.

I remember reading an article about "Starter Marriages" ( a very short marriage that you have in your late teens to mid twenties, before you actually settle down to your 2nd and "real" marriage") and that they are very common with today's twenty-somethings.

[identity profile] kellinator.livejournal.com 2002-07-20 07:14 pm (UTC)(link)
Yeah, lots of my friends have had starter marriages. In fact, I retroactively consider my three-year relationship with my college sweetheart to have been a starter marriage, or at least a starter partnering. (We spent almost all our time together. Even took classes together.)

As much as I bitch about my love life, I'm kinda hoping that the delays and stuff will help me to avoid some of the pitfalls. I've always been extremely romantic/idealistic about wanting to get married just once, for life. But I guess we all start out feeling that way.

[identity profile] seaofsin.livejournal.com 2002-07-21 10:03 am (UTC)(link)
Yeah, I consider my 3 year relationship with asshole to be a starter of some sort. I want to get married only once. And I hope I've picked the right guy this time...

Oh honey...

[identity profile] elizabethf.livejournal.com 2002-07-20 07:13 pm (UTC)(link)
I was going through a divorce when I was your age. I was a step-mother for 6 years (well, 2 by legal terms, since we were married for only 2 1/2 of our 6 years together)

It's amazing. Lots of differences and dilineations between people. Rarely a surprise anymore, though each situation is different!

Re: Oh honey...

[identity profile] kellinator.livejournal.com 2002-07-20 07:36 pm (UTC)(link)
Yeah... that seems so foreign to me, because I still feel so young. As in little-kid young. I guess I'm resisting growing up. ;)

[identity profile] edie22.livejournal.com 2002-07-20 09:14 pm (UTC)(link)
Dude, you're my little brother's age! You have plenty of time!

Of course, when I was 24, I had been in the same relationship since I was 19, and just married. All my friends now tho, like NONE of them are married.

[identity profile] tikimama.livejournal.com 2002-07-22 10:59 am (UTC)(link)
Hey, me, too. Hmmmm, Edie and I are living parallel lives.

Everyone's life is so individual, it's hard to say someone is "too young" for this or that. I mean, I got married a week after I turned 24. Was I ready? Well, its five years later, we're still here. Did I know other people who were the same age who weren't ready? Yeah. But you know, they might never be ready, no matter how old or mature they are.

The moral is: keep your eyes on your own paper. Don't worry about comparison.

[identity profile] pinkeffigy.livejournal.com 2002-07-20 10:19 pm (UTC)(link)
Yeah. My cousin is in a somewhat sucky marriage. went from high school graduation straight into wedding about a month after. has two kids. Was conviced god told her to marry him. That he was THE ONE. And will likely stay in marriage just to prove herself right, and everyone who warned her otherwise (ok, everyone in general) wrong.
Happens way more than any of us want to think about.